it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
