You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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