how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I think pants incapable of making pants work
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
