10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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