That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
