I'm really into asian looking animals
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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