I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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