think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
