Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!

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  (630): dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg! http://tfl.nu/jn1p
  Replies (19) Good night (747) Bad night (3305) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding

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  (931): don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding http://tfl.nu/47j9
  Replies (10) Good night (5584) Bad night (994) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day

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  (508): I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day http://tfl.nu/qyf0
  Replies (30) Good night (3752) Bad night (924) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.

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  (904): I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale. http://tfl.nu/rt3p
  Replies (12) Good night (4346) Bad night (1152) Order T-Shirt
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan

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  (269): You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan http://tfl.nu/otnu
  Replies (44) Good night (6268) Bad night (898) Order T-Shirt
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.

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  (765): we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright. http://tfl.nu/328h
  Replies (17) Good night (7128) Bad night (919) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...

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  (610): You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice... http://tfl.nu/x7so
  Replies (7) Good night (4139) Bad night (765) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.

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  (601): He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows. http://tfl.nu/pp93
  Replies (15) Good night (6728) Bad night (1796) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap

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  (425): You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap http://tfl.nu/o5dz
  Replies (9) Good night (4384) Bad night (945) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.

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  (+44): That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard. http://tfl.nu/cdhm
  Replies (20) Good night (4700) Bad night (628) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.

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  (859): Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss. http://tfl.nu/wyge
  Replies (12) Good night (4170) Bad night (975) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all

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  (412): I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all http://tfl.nu/skme
  Replies (6) Good night (706) Bad night (1500) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?

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  (860): i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet? http://tfl.nu/i7et
  Replies (7) Good night (902) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.

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  (215): No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there. http://tfl.nu/8rlf
  Replies (8) Good night (776) Bad night (2678) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.

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  (760): So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related. http://tfl.nu/jwal
  Replies (5) Good night (1216) Bad night (140) Order T-Shirt

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