Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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