Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I cockslap morals
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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