I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.