Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
i out mim tonsoeep
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
