the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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