i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Sober January is a disaster.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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