puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize