I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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