Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Found the puke drawer
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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