so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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