in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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