if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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