I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
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I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
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You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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