Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
