A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize
