i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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