I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
