she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
