8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
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I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
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Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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