my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize