drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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