do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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