I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
