why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
