Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
