Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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