Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
