And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
