i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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