I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Randomize
