just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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