For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
