this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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