oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
