my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize