erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
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