Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much rum. So many feels.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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