You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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