i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
