Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Randomize
