is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
