I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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